Dosha Love—Kapha Style

Dosha Love—Kapha Style

OMG, I just met the most “Kapha-rific” man! What does that mean? Well, let me share…I am in for some great snuggling, hand holding, and attention. We will go for dessert, enjoy time with his friends (because everyone will LOVE him in his friend group), and he might even suggest we make a project to clean out my disorganized car! The saying, “Netflix and Chill” was definitely coined by a kapha—I LOVE KAPHA.

In the language of the three doshas, kapha partners are the “Ayurvedic Teddy Bears” that can bring on the BEST bear hug of all time. Of course, getting them to let go can be another issue.

In understanding how to be able to enjoy the bounty of your kapha dominate partner it is important to be aware of how they operate with regard to the inherent qualities of their nature, or Prakriti.


two people sitting in field


Kapha is governed by water and earth, so stability and accountability is a hallmark of their nature. They are devoted to their partners and loyal in their friendships. (Note to self: do not cross them as they have a fabulous memory and can have a hard time letting go of a hurt.)

Here are my top six suggestions to keep everything “sweet as honey” (another kapha favorite) between you and your cuddly, kind hearted, kapha sweetie:

  1. Make them something tasty, from your heart, and they are yours FOREVER! Not just sweets, although we all know that is their favorite taste. They will really appreciate any gesture involving cooking or baking a delicious goodie that comes from your heart.
  2. Go to the beach, lake, or pond, take a swim... kapha loves water! Best if we can get them moving while in the water. Either way, this will make your kapha's heart shine.
  3. Let them snuggle up for an afternoon cat nap with you (but wake them up after thirty minutes, as kapha can build with daytime sleeping).
  4. Try to stick to your plans! Kapha likes to have order and organization. While they are super understanding and rarely critical, they do get irritated with the whole vata “spur of the moment” thing! And pittas please…no yelling! Kaphas will shut down and turn into a “human rock” when faced with hot, sharp jabs from pitta's tongue.
  5. Give the passion time to build…kaphas take their time to “get started” but once they are warmed up…they can sustain themselves beyond any other doshic capacity!
  6. If they do not respond right back to your question, give them space. Kapha's like to think before they speak (novel concept for vata and pitta who are more spontaneous or reactive) and kapha loves to lay back and listen.

One or two hints to support your love staying balanced must include the suggestion to support opportunities for your beloved to be in nature. Being outside, in the elements, is so healing for all dosha types, but especially kapha. The other inside tip is to find a gentle routine you can do together that involves movement (besides THAT), like an evening walk with the dogs everyday, or a morning jog. Kapha can become stuck and stagnat, like always wanting to go to the same diner, watch the same show, or “Rock Your World” in the same position. So, a little gentle daily movement routine will decrease the buildup of the heavy and dense qualities that can bring on stagnation and offer a little “spice” that can be nice!

About the Author

Kathryn Templeton, AP, LPC, AYT, E500RYT, C-IAYT

Kathryn Templeton, MA, E-500 RYT, C-IAYT, and Ayurvedic practitioner, has devoted her life to the health of others. A psychotherapist for 30 years, Kathryn...

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